Because I'm SO Much Better at Criticism than Creation......the NOT Wedding

I've always had this great knack for picking other people's ideas to pieces, it's not constructive criticism, it's downright bitchiness and we all know it.  I'm not much on the actual 'having my own ideas' front so I'm currently trying to decide on a career which will cater to my talents....I don't think it will go down well as a hooker - 'Well, I could tell you how to do that better love....' or any kind of designer expected to deal with the public - ' You really want a SEA theme for your bathroom, how fucking o-RIG-inal of you....' so any ideas would be appreciated. In the meantime, I will pick on people's wedding decisions as that's the main item on MY agenda at the moment.

As any classy bride knows, the starting point is always 'the dress'



A little more hair and a little less gut would've been much more digestible...this is an aberration on so many levels, but I'm sure she felt very much the princess

I'll bet Bobby just luuurves this one....and the wedding car was no doubt an old school (I'd say Torana in Australia....) muscle car with at least one panel a fetching shade of primer grey....







I've never felt so justified using the term 'frou frou'

Suit, I'm sorry...but you are NOT Keanu Reeves and can therefore NOT pull off the 'Matrix' suit, it was NEVER cool...when will you people learn? You would've been much better off with a full tuxedo and tails.

 http://www.ruethedayblog.com/2009/06/terribly-trashy-tuxes/  offers up a full selection of horrors in the tux department...this is actually the LEAST of them -

The shoes....I didn't want to bore you with heaps....so I just picked out my personal favourites...behold:

I'm speechless....really

The super smooth updo, I'm almost certain I'm alone in hating this, but way to look like a freaking mannequin.....hours of effort to have Ray Martin lacquer sheen hair.....yuk! (local joke for Aussies there, sorry)    The source of the nastiness

The makeup....you know how difficult it was to pare this one down??

Convenient list with a picture of the crimes against pores

This, again, was the tip of the iceberg...but I know we all have limited patience..so 'The Cowboy Cake'

I'm sure some would disagree, but surely even BARBIE would puke about this much pink and glitter....heave!

Really, LOVE HEART CUT OUTS??

All done with my little rant now. I only feel the need to do this when I've reached a stand still with my own preparations....right now I'm trying to finalise table decorations....god only knows what rubbish we'll end up with, it will probably make someone else's wedding 'don't's' list...hehe. Night...I'm going to moisturise. 

Oh, before I go, little update - lavender, bicarb, rosemary carpet thing was kinda a waste of time...still smelt much the same afterwards...unless you got down at floor level and sniffed it...seems a lot of effort to prove it worked ; )  Bye for now....

                                                          Anji